Regrets: One step away from success

Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda.

Ever felt like you’re just one step away from success, but something’s holding you back? It’s not just you — we all have the tools for success within us. The real challenge? Overcoming the roadblocks, we set for ourselves.

Regret is a Nasty Word 😟

Coulda, woulda, shoulda. These words often echo in the chambers of our minds, marking moments of missed opportunities and unfulfilled potentials. Regret, a powerful and sometimes overwhelming emotion, can dictate our lives and businesses. I observed a fascinating dichotomy among the attendees at a recent business event. On the one hand, there were the ‘aloof’ individuals, either genuinely supportive of the speakers or indifferent due to a lack of interest in the specific business domain. On the other hand, there stood the ‘regrets’ — a group characterized by their coulda, woulda, shoulda mentality, often expressing less positive and sometimes unpleasant sentiments.

The Duality of Human Nature 🔄

This observation brings to mind a couple of poignant quotes that I hold dear. Mel Robbins aptly states, “Regret is scarier than change,” while Jim Rohn reminds us, “We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.”

These words resonate deeply, underscoring the constant battle between taking proactive steps and succumbing to the paralysis of regret. It’s a crucial realization that regret is not just an emotion; it’s a barrier to our success and fulfilment.

In this article, we’ll delve into the complexities of regret and explore the inherent potential within each of us. We often hear the refrain that we already possess everything we need to succeed. While this is fundamentally true, the path to unlocking this potential is riddled with internal and external challenges. But fear not, for these obstacles are not insurmountable.

Overcoming Barriers to Success 🚀

Have you ever felt stuck because you didn’t know how to do something? You’re not alone. I know how it isn’t a dead end — it’s just a little bump in the road. Nowadays, answers are just a click away. Think about how often you’ve heard someone say, “I found a great YouTube video and just followed that.” It’s pretty common, right? So, not knowing how to do something isn’t a big problem; it’s more like a tiny hurdle you can easily jump over.

But here’s the big question: If we have all the stuff we need to be successful inside us, then why don’t we all reach in, grab it, and become super successful? It sounds easy, but there’s a catch. Just like we have all the answers inside, we also have our own roadblocks — the things that hold us back. It’s like having a little angel on one shoulder and a tiny devil on the other.

People talk about these roadblocks using big words like motivation, executive functioning, and resilience. But I like to keep it simple. In my view, there are a bunch of different reasons, big and small, that can keep our handbrake on.

I believe in a simple truth: we move away from pain and towards pleasure. This idea is a good start, but we need to dig deeper to get it.

“Slaters Why We Do” — The Five Key Areas 🔍

Alright, let’s break it down. I’ve come up with something I call “Slaters Why We Do.” It’s not a kitchen sink with everything and the kitchen sink in it. It’s more like a toolkit with just the top tools you need. I like simple things, so I made it five areas, but it’s really ten because each area has two parts. Let’s dive in.

Being — Brain & Body 🧠

• Brain: Have you ever heard of cognitive biases? They’re like mental shortcuts that shape how we see things and make decisions. Think of them as the brain’s little tricks.
• Body: Your physical and mental health greatly affects your thinking and acting. If your body’s not happy, your brain’s not happy.

Spirit — Heart & Belief ❤️

• Heart: Emotions are super powerful. They can push you to make decisions immediately or shape your choices over time.
• Belief: This is all about what you stand for — your personal values and ethics. It’s like your moral compass.

Wisdom — Know & Past 📘

• Know: This is about what you know and the quality of information you have. The more you know, the better your choices.
• Past: Your past experiences are like lessons that shape your habits and decisions. It’s like your personal history book.

Setting — Friends and Space 👥

• Friends: Have you ever felt pressured by friends or what other people think? That’s social influence, and it can really sway your decisions.
• Space is about where you are and what’s happening around you. Your environment can make a big difference in your choices.

Season — Need & Stage ⏳

• Need: Your inner drives and motivations push you to make choices.
• Stage: This is about where you are in life — your age and life stage. Different stages mean different needs and decisions.

Putting It All Together 🌟

So, what does all this mean? It’s pretty cool because it shows us that doing what we need for business success isn’t some magical, lucky thing. It’s not out of reach for anyone. It’s comforting and confidence-boosting to realize that anyone can do anything. But, there are always those handbrakes — the things holding us back. And if you can release those handbrakes, imagine how much more you could do!

I’m not going to go wild and say that everyone can do anything — like the whole ‘great American Dream’ thing. But I am saying you’ve got all the tools and roadblocks inside you.

You’ve Got Choices 👐

Want to go it alone? That’s totally cool. If it’s just you centre stage, you’re already familiar with words like discipline, commitment, and resilience. These are the tools you’ve used to get this far in business, and they deserve a big round of applause.

Or, remember what Joe Cocker said? “I get by with a little help from my friends.” You don’t have to go it alone. You’ve got your tribe, your group of people who support you. Use them!

The Role of a Coach 👤

And here’s where a coach comes in — a coach can be a part of your tribe. A coach can help you find the tools inside you, deal with the roadblocks, and progress towards success.

Conclusion 🏁

Ultimately, it’s all about knowing yourself — your strengths, challenges, and potential. Whether you walk this path alone or with a little help, the journey towards success is always worth it. Remember, every choice you make shapes your journey. So choose wisely, and never let regret hold you back.